We Could Have Had It All
by degrassi-is-love
Summary: He has moved on to the mysterious, punk-rock, fun loving new girl. She has moved on to her charming childhood friend. But can you really move on from your first true love, or just pretend and hope no one can see through you. Rated T for now, will change?


**So..I don't really know what this is. I was listening to the song Someone Like You by Adele. Between that, and what's going on with Eli and Clare right now, I felt inspired to write this. I guess if I get some reviews; I'll continue the story. Constructive Criticism would be fantastic! xo :D **

***Also; I don't own Degrassi. If I did, Eli and Clare would still be happy little misfits and we would all live happily after. **

**And if you don't like this story, well, you told me to play basketball... **

"Has anyone ever told you have incredible eyes ?"

_You Have Pretty Eyes_

_ Thanks, so uhh; I'll se you around?_

_ Guess You Will_

I ignored the aching feeling in my stomach, and looked up at my boyfriend; who's big brown eyes were glowing.

"Hm... a few times... But it's twenty thousand times as special when you say it" I giggled, climbing into the lap of my boyfriend of three months.

Of course, I was lying through my teeth. I could think of a time I had heard it when it was a trillion times as special. But Jake didn't need to know that. I didn't need further reminisce on it either. It got me absolutely nowhere.

"Is everything alright Clarebear?" Jake asked concerned, pushing a strand of my auburn hair out of my face.

I winced at the name Clarebear. Don't get me wrong; coming from Jake's mouth, it sounded positively adorable. But it was a constant reminder of who I used to be, apposed to who I thought I was now.

I faked a smile and wrapped my arms around his shoulders

"Of course, I'm just a little tired, stayed up all night writing"

That statement wasn't entirely false. I did stay up all night writing... It just wasn't exactly the first thing on my mind, and it wasn't the main reason for my long face.

He sighed and kissed my cheek softly.

"Well I better get going anyway, I'll let you get your sleep. Tell your parents I say thanks for the lovely dinner"

I smiled weakly and gave him one last chaste kiss before he walked out my door.

"Goodnight Clare" He said slowly, as if there was more he wanted to say.

"Sweet dreams Jake"

He stood in the doorway for a few seconds, his gaze lingering on me; as if he expected me to say more.

He finally smiled shyly at me and walked out my door.

I waited until I his footsteps down the stairs, until I placed my pillow over my head and let out a exasperated sigh.

I didn't get it. I broke up with _him. _I was the one who told _him _that I couldn't deal with his behavior anymore. So why is it that 6 months later, he is still all I think about.

It really didn't make any sense at all to me. Jake was so unbelievably perfect. He was athletic, charming, kind, considerate. All the girls at degrassi absolutely loved him. I guess you could say he was like KC, just with common sense and a better haircut.

But still, here I am, lying in bed, only one person on my mind.

_Elijah Goldsworthy _

For the first few months after I had broken up with him, he was pretty torn apart. I felt absolutely horrible about this, don't get me wrong. But, absolutely everyone was telling me to just let it go; there was no use saving our relationship. Alli told me he was a psychopath who didn't deserve me. My parents practically banned me from speaking his name in the house. Even Adam persuaded me against repairing things with him, claiming Eli was far too unstable for me to deal with at the moment.

So I moved on to Jake. You can imagine how much my parents loved that; me getting together with my good, christian childhood friend. Alli loved it since he was so popular, it gave her all the double dates she wanted with fellow football players. And I loved it too. We had fantastic chemistry from the beginning, picking up right where we left off as children. But it just wasn't the same. I still went to bed thinking of Eli, _my eli_, every night before going to bed. I wondered if he was okay, if he still thought about me, and if our breakup was really for the best.

But a few months later, all those questions were answered. One day I walked into the dot with my mother, only to see Eli with another girl. It happened to be the new girl, the new punk-rock girl that might have well has been Eli's long lost twin, Imogen. When I saw them together, they looked happy. He was looking at her the same exact way he used to look at me. That's what killed me the most, that he could actually replace me.

But what killed me even more, was that he looked stable; more stable then he had ever been with me. I'm wishing Eli well of course, but to see him walking through the school halls, and appear to be in better condition then ever, with this new girl he had known for all of a month, it stung.

He didn't cling to her. He didn't have his arm possessively wrapped around her. He just looked happy, plain and simple. Which for some reason, is what I just couldn't provide him.

After sitting in my room, wallowing in self pity for a couple more minutes, my phone began to vibrate. I looked at the flashing screen; secretly praying it was just some solicitation number, I wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone.

While the number didn't have a name attached to it, I would recognize the digits anywhere. _Elilijah Goldsworthy was calling me. _


End file.
